Porn for the Blind – A Retrospective

In Listen, Look

Pornfortheblind.org – which, somewhat ironically, needs to be seen to be believed – is a supposed ‘not-for-profit organisation’ that made some hay in the blogosphere back in 2008 for its amateur audio descriptions of adult movie clips.

With a continuum ranging from almost acceptable to dubiously legal, the site is comedy gold, and the main question seems to be whether this was intentional on the part of the creators, or an example of the internet cut raw. If you’re a partially sighted individual, you are more likely to find satisfaction through taking part in a duel than through this website’s motley collection of disturbing fare.

Reflecting its incredibly lax quality control and anarchic community, PFTB’s offering is quite diverse, and every click will give you something new. There is (very) occasionally a passable female narrator getting into it, but for each of these there is also clip of a man in his mid-twenties narrating a ‘deep throat slamming’ video in relentless monotone, which may kill the mood somewhat, or a worryingly high pitch voiced child/teenager trying to mess with the listener’s head. Listening to the clips here is like going deeper into an Inception dream, with the constant worry that you’ll go too far and never come back up… and that you won’t be the same when you emerge.

I was surprised at the original portrayal of PFTB as a “distributed, community-generated accessibility project”. Any description that doesn’t include the words ‘cautionary’ and ‘tale’ should be investigated by trading standards.

One can’t help but feel that this site was already a relic of a bygone era when it launched, though, as it still seems based around preview movies which – with the rise of PornHub et. al. – nobody in their right mind would watch nowadays. No more do people have to desperately cue up 20 second sample clips in Windows Media Player or watch late night freeview.

I suppose what I’m really trying to say is that, in the Web 2.0 zeitgeist, there’s absolutely a market here for narrators of feature length blind porn.

Please don’t call me.

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