I can’t get out of bed in the morning. There, I said it. I’ve been struggling for a while now and it’s starting to get my down. If I wasn’t such a weather-obsessed science geek I might be inclined to seek medical help. However, my source of my pain is a giant ball of burning gas we call THE SUN. It’s absence is starting to piss me off.
The golden rays of yesteryear that increased my levels of serotonin and suppressed my levels of melatonin have been cruelly prised from my hands like crack from a baby. Most days, when the sun rears its bashful head, the photons barely tickle the back of my neck. And I’m suffering.
I’ve developed a plan of attack for the coming weeks to help me get up bright and early, like the old days when the sun rose before I did.
Step One: Go to bed at a reasonable hour. May sound overrated but Adam and Joe were on to something here.
Step Two: Drink something just before you go to bed, so hopefully your bladder will wake you up roughly eight hours later and force your body from the warm duvet covers.
Step Three: Leave your curtains/blinds open a little before you settle down for the night, to tempt in any early dawn rays that may have escaped the clutches of winter’s iron grip of gloom.
Step Four: Set up your alarm and place your device on the other side of your room. This works really well if set booby-traps too. You may wake up pissed off and angry, but at least you’ll be out of bed.
If all else fails, declare a state of hibernation, and bed down until spring.